


Sugar Motta Goes to McDonald’s

by TeruTeruObliterator11037



Category: Glee
Genre: Blaine gets Bullied, Crack, Gen, Heart-Wrenching Tragedy, Kurt and Rachel are Trapped in the PlayPlace, McDonald’s, Mention of Riverdale, Mr Schue Raps, Sugar Commits Atrocities, Tina is a Simp, Vapor Cream, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:47:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24867805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeruTeruObliterator11037/pseuds/TeruTeruObliterator11037
Summary: Sugar Motta is hungry for some grub, so she goes to McDonald’s and commits some felonies along the way!
Relationships: (mentioned) - Relationship, Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Kudos: 5





	Sugar Motta Goes to McDonald’s

**Author's Note:**

> After much beating around the bush, I have done it. I have wrote Glee crack fic. Will my anime humor transfer well to real life? We will find out.  
> I had a lot of fun making this, so I hope you enjoy!

sugar motto rolled up to the McDonald’s establishment in her mercedes car.

”sugar get out of my toyota”, Mercedes Jones lamented, “I’m not your Uber driver. I’m selling my car to support my tater tots habit and going back to callufornia”

”whatever u say ✨”

”please don’t commit any more crimes”

sugar did not answer, as she slung her juicy couture purse filled with actual orange juice over her shoulder and walked into the drive through, crushing the car in front of her with her red bottom heels

(inside that car was ackshuly her boyfriend rory Flanagan :’(( That’s why we don’t see him in season 4, why does Ryan Murphy lie :’((( #gleefacts)

she walked up to the order microphone thing at the drive thru and squawked “IS THIS THING On uwu??”  
  


“knock a little louder sugar” Said the voice from the speaker 

sugar proceed to punch the light-up order menu with her superhuman strength as her glistening muscles ripped through her dior sweater 

the voice relented.

”hi i am blaine welcome to McDonald’s what would you like?”  
  


“hiii ✨ lemme get a f uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

𝒷𝓊𝓇𝑔𝑒𝓇?”  
  


“which one?? All we sell is boigas”

”can I get the big fish sandwich?”

”that’s from burger king. No ones perfect, you just proved it ❤️ Do you mean filet o fish?“

”Ew no. Big Mac please. Can I please have an ice cream”

”sorry, our ice cream machine is broken :( would u like a McFlurry”

”𝓌ό𝓤Ĺ𝐃 𝕪ό𝐮 ｌ𝒾ҜＥ α 𝐦¢𝔽Ｌ𝓊ℝＲү?????????? EH-WRONG. What do I look like? NO, TEll me what I look like. I’ll tell you what you look like. You look like moose from river dale. U look so much like moose von river dale that when I was watching the television program from my McMansion Deluxe I googled who played him. And guess who it was. Not you. I was shocked and disappointed, all men do is disappoint. AlL YOU do is disappoint. You will never be truly loved, no matter how much you seek it, Blaine Anderson. People don’t truly love you. They love the façade of a cheery, charismatic acapella heartthrob with a head full of joy and a wallet fat with cash. If any of your snappy warbler friends were to find out who you really were - a needy, imperfect, jealous, controlling person who does what he does not because he likes it but because he loves the recognition- they would abandon you in a heartbeat. Same goes for the new directions and Kurt. You are no longer a teenage dream. You a disaster waiting to happen. Now get me my ice cream by any means necessary, and make it on the house or I will make your life miserable, Blaine Warbler.”  
  


”yyesss, mam. anything else?”  
  


“No thank u! <3”

sugar proceeded to the next window, awaiting her food, cars beeped behind her. She filled their gas tanks with her purse juice. Whatever

sugar flipped open her flip phone. It was a call from Kurt ! Omg 

“hewwo this is sugar!”

“I have something to ask of you. Rachel’s got us trapped in the McDonald’s PlayPlace. We’re currently in the bubble facing the dining area, do you see us waving at you? Please get us out- we haven’t eaten our order yet.”

sugar closed her flip phone. She looked up to see Kurt frantically waving from a playplace bubble. She took off one loubotin Heel, and threw it directly into the convex window, killing Kurt instantly.

suddenly, she turned to see Tina violently knocking on the window with a bag of food in hand.   
sugar punched through the window, glass shattering and causing permanent damage to tina’s left eye

”omg so sorry Tina! Didn’t mean to do that! :’(“

”its ok. now Blaine and I are twins ❤️“  
  


”the volume on this bus is astronomical”

sugar yanked her bag of Mickey ds away from Tina. The Big Mac was there, and so was an ice cream. Howveer, sugar lookded closer to see that it was acksuly a McFlurry in a cone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

”excuse me? This service is unacceptable. I am disgusted to even call it service.“

“Honestly, that's what I call a cool story bro. Such a riveting tale, I honestly copy and pasted it to word, saved on my hard drive, backed it up on a jump drive, drove to the bank, put the jump drive in the safe deposit box, and will leave it there until my kids turn about 12 (when they can actually state their age, and ask what it is I'm showing them), when I will pick it up, put it in an old USB drive reader and relay this cool story to them and tell them, "kids, this is what a cool story should look and sound like...not like the stories your generation tells.””

  
“I want to speak with your manager.”

“sure ok lol. I have plans to sneak into a window and rub an unsuspecting victim with Vick’s Vapo Rub anyways. Have fun.”

tina called for the manager

out of the darkness arose William Schuester, wearing a vest over his McDonald’s uniform and somehow disobeying everY law By approaching.

”Hi, what’s the problem?”

”I asked for an ice cream, but blain and Tina gave me a mic flurry!”

”Sugar, I understand your feelings, however

This thing right here  
Is lettin' all the ladies know  
What guys talk about  
You know, the finer things in life  
A heh heh heh  
Check it out

Ooh that dress so scandalous  
And you know another guy can't handle it  
So you shakin that thang like who's the ish  
With a look in yer eyes so devilish  
Uh

You like to dance on the hip hop spots  
And you cruise to crews to connect the dots  
Not just urban she like the pop  
'Cause she was 'Livin' La Vida Loca'

She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck  
Thighs like what, what, what  
Baby move your butt, butt, butt  
I think I'll sing it again

She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck  
Thighs like what, what, what  
All night long  
Let me see that thon”

mr schues rapping was so bad that it killed sugar instantly and now the McDonald’s is considered a radioactive hot zone. :’(

like 4 part 2!!!!!

**Author's Note:**

> This was a doozy to write. Nonetheless, I have successfully (?) written a Glee piece.  
> Here are some petitions tee hee: https://pendingpetition.carrd.co/
> 
> Please let me know if you have any questions, comments, or concerns - I love feedback. :)  
> Have a great day!


End file.
